Here I go with some, i hope you like 'em.
This happened in Australia.
A wounded soldier asks the nurse: Did i come here to die??
the nurse replies: No, love you came here yesterday.
(it might be senseless at first but if you read it out loud you will get it. The pronunciation is the key of the joke)
A man asks a lawyer : what are ur fees for two questions??
The lawyer replies: 700 Euros, what's your 2nd??
Your momma is a carpenter's dream, she's as flat as a board and easy to nail.
and for me this is the best joke ever, unfortunately i will have to write it, and it's not a short one.
here we go....
A girls asks her boyfriend to come over friday night and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl tells him that after the dinner, she wud like to have sex with him for the first time.The boy is ecstatic, but he had never had sex before, so he decides to take a trip to the pharmacy to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about half an hour. He tells the boy everything there's to know about condoms and sex. At the register the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy a 3-pack a 10-pack a family pack. The boy inists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.That night, the boy shows up at his gf parents' house and meets his gf at the door. ''Ohh, i'm so excited for you to meet my parents!! Come on in!! the boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offer to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. finally after 20 minutes with his head down the gf leans over and whispers to her boyfriend ''i had no idea you were that religious. The boy turns , and whispers back, '' I had no idea ur father was a pharmacist... Loool!!!!
edited, I didnt know where to create this thread so I thought this wud be the proper place, feel free to move it if it's not in the right place
Last edited by Francomacc on Sat Mar 08, 2008 8:28 am; edited 1 time in total